Weekend Reflections
I’ll speak for myself. I want Love, Freedom, and Fulfillment. These are usually the answers people give for what they want in life.
When given the opportunity to achieve them, I have delayed or denied them because of Fear, Limited Thinking, and Lack of Strategy or Support.
August 1st will be 18 months since I moved to New York City. I feel like Moses leaving his comfortable life for the backside of a mountain. New York is the steepest of mountains. I didn’t kill a man that put me on the run like Moses, but I took a lot of life trying to prove myself to people who still didn’t believe I was one of them.
The mountain is hard. Moses stayed on the mountain for 40 years in a state of obscurity. At age 40, I left my hometown for the illest of Mountains.
NYC has definitely been the place where I have had to be honest internally to say that everything is unknown, but the mountain forced me to unlearn “Southern Hospitality” that buried the true identity of who I am. The mountain has humbled me and at the same time unhinged in me what was never meant to be caged.
That daily feeling of the unknown caused me to realize how much I need to move my body, meditate, and exercise my creativity so when the burning bush moment comes, liberation can happen.
Freedom isn’t free. It’s priceless, but it will cost you. Unlearning is hard because it takes away the safety net in what was really all an illusion.
I’m thankful for the mountain every day. I’m thankful that it brought me back to the real version of God that I needed. It brought me to being okay loving me without believing I need money, a career, or a soulmate to feel worthy.
It didn’t reduce me; it increased me to believe and live the fullness of me. The parts that I felt were too much because I was told they were too much. The real truth is I was being too less by listening to niggas telling me I was too much. I wasn’t enough. I’m not enough. I’m more than enough. And going to be even more every single day. Even while feeling that fear that I’m feeling even while writing this post. I’m doing the shit anyway.
✌🏾